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am "writing"
Dec. 29th, 2025 01:16 amapologies for crimes against creativity or whatever, but this is machine (LLM) assisted. backing up my ~40k-ish and climbing Dragon Age fic.
( Read more... )
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These characters are dialectic, which means they are kinda the same character, with some major deviations due to material circumstances mostly, like mirror universe versions that had to become a different person to overcome a differing obstacle. And so these differences are somewhat arbitrary and meant to contrast...to reinforce The Themes.
That might sound bad, but I think many couples are written like this, because when couples mirror the other's petty mannerisms, they look like that to bystanders. But I would say I kinda think of this couple as perhaps one character (sometimes similar or different characters because it depends) kinda like the voices of Disco Elysium are one character.
Except I have chosen to make the voices in one character as seen in DE different characters who form different alliances and polycules as a part of their great heroic influences in the DA cannon. So their interpersonal relationships reflect the "ego state," which has the qualities of both an ego (like a personality fragment) but also kinda a proto-state (army, logistics) within a nation. Real egos of strong leaders, metaphorical egos of the spirits among soldiers, the clash of that conflict if I am deep enough to write soldiers as individuals learning the discipline as a body of armed "men".
###tHeMeS timeline 01
00: Circle tower, Areli is the protagonist
panopticon, surveillance, manufacturing consent
jealousy, possession, cyrano
education/propaganda in religious institutions & secular war machines
beauty/inspiration/tokenizing
alienation & spiritual isolation
Hello again
Jan. 19th, 2025 04:43 amI am working on my website at panshiko.neocities.org.
I'm not as much of a designer as I was. I have so much bitterness of being pushed into the art modes of production, clearly gender role reasons for this. resentment for the artists for their various cults and abuses. resentment over sexism, misogyny and gatekeeping in tech jobs which are offered to the dumbest boys imaginable. and as ever and always, I'm operating the internet as a collective unconscious and attempting to incept socialist dreams in working people.
Now I build a rep volunteering to reform society imminently. I hope one day I'll be admitted to labor aristocracy so I can provide for a small chosen family and save my boyfriend's life/his entire mouth.
I'm not as much of a designer as I was. I have so much bitterness of being pushed into the art modes of production, clearly gender role reasons for this. resentment for the artists for their various cults and abuses. resentment over sexism, misogyny and gatekeeping in tech jobs which are offered to the dumbest boys imaginable. and as ever and always, I'm operating the internet as a collective unconscious and attempting to incept socialist dreams in working people.
Now I build a rep volunteering to reform society imminently. I hope one day I'll be admitted to labor aristocracy so I can provide for a small chosen family and save my boyfriend's life/his entire mouth.
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Nullam ut tristique sapien, ullamcorper tempor enim. Nam adipiscing eget nunc ac consectetur. Donec et nisl sapien. Phasellus in sem porta, porta odio id, tincidunt libero. Ut id sodales ligula. Ut sit amet lacus interdum, viverra purus porttitor, bibendum purus. Nullam interdum nibh eu elit pharetra faucibus. Donec massa magna, sodales at metus at, tristique luctus nisl. Donec sed turpis a neque fermentum eleifend nec in sapien. In in felis in massa congue imperdiet.
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I am able to balance a budget on part time minimum wage, can you? I have no credit history. Somehow, I am legitimately brilliant at balancing budgets through personal austerity. And I have a fucking math learning disorder with ADHD and THAT'S NOT ALL!
Once upon a time, I got a job at McDonalds, who promised me full time hours. Tragically, I suck at flipping burgers. So, they changed their mind about my hours, and I started working part time. They told me this was only temporary, but they lied. Before I worked there for nine months, I planned my life around a verbal agreement, but I didn't get that agreement on contract, so I had to eat shit. both full and part time workers were entitled to $4 of free food every day. The free food was more worthwhile in helping us function than my paycheck. When I was working full time, I earned about $40 a day. But when they cut my hours, they didn't cut the free food I was entitled to as an employee meal. So I never bought groceries for nine months. I shared my employee meals with my husband. That's how I worked at McDonalds part time without charging anything to credit cards or starving to death.
Let me explain capitalism: In economics, capital is already produced durable goods that do stuff, and all money is stupid and meaningless. Credit is corporate welfare. It is totally unfair that we spend so much on corporate welfare and so little on people welfare. Because jobs suck.
In all of my years on OD, I have attempted to bait random people into an argument over politics, and I have never succeeded...until you. The only people who note me on politics do so to agree with me. I can only assume that people who would disagree with me are just too intimidated by how right I am all of the time. So when I got 5 notes from the same guy who doesn't like Obamacare, this is exciting.
After McDonalds I started doing streaming video prostitution. As a "webcam model" I could count on making $60 a day. I could make quite a bit more than that if I was up for it. I can't tell you what kind of hours I was working. Because I didn't get paid to prepare to work, time becomes all jumbled. I worked for myself, I could take tax exemptions for all of the computers I bought to stream my high quality pussy squirt on the tubes, and I paid for my husband's health care in cash. That was much more capitalistic than McDonalds.
Jobs are bad. Fuck jobs. I don't care if the hours for people's jobs are cut. I hate jobs. Maybe that makes me an anarchist, but I don't think so. I don't think jobs are good for us. I think Americans should be entrepreneurs. That's why you and your job creators are stupid. Capitalists create their own jobs. They justify their own existences. I don't support most job creators. The biggest job creator in the United States is Wal-Mart.
I don't understand why people think that the government health care death panels exist but the private corporate health care death panels don't exist. You might be amazed to discover that private health care companies are for profit corporations. Private health insurance companies deny people for health insurance all of the time. Actually, Obamacare forces them to stop turning people away for not being profitable! Why does everyone trust health care insurance companies not to kill grandma to raise money for stupid, frivolous absurdities like the Papa John's guy who says he can't raise the price of individual pizzas by 14c to pay for healthcare while literally living in a castle with a moat?
The private sector is lying to you and making a villain out of the government.
The United States is a young country. Humans have invented more crazy shit in the last 75 years than we have in the last 75,000 years. Our entire situation of humanity is unprecedented, essentially, but the US doubly so. So we have attempted to establish democracy here, after killing all of the natives with our alcohol, smallpox and firearms. I think democracy works, but my standards for democracy are pretty low. I think democracy is better than monarchy and that's all that matters to me. So don't tell me that democracy sucks. You suck.
You need to learn more about the law. I attempted to go to school for political science, but I dropped out. Schools are probably better than jobs, but I don't know how much better. I don't like that Obama supports schools, either, but spending-- tra--la-la-- it happens whether you want it to or not. We have to influence what the government chooses to spend that money on. We desperately need to redirect money being spent on destructive policies, such as the War on Drugs.
I am a one issue voter because I know a lot about drugs and Obamacare makes sense to me. Humans are specialized creatures unfortunately. I am pretty terrified about his international policy, but that shit is so secret there's no making sense of it. My only clues about foreign policy come from wikileaks, and Obama is clearly waaaaay more intelligent than GOP at those evil schemes, so... that's something, I guess. Obama killed Bin Laden and wins at foreign policy automatically.
The law is ridiculous. In Florida, it is illegal to tie an alligator to a fire hydrant. Recently, buttsex was illegal in many states, and I think it still is in a few of them. Facism exists when stupid laws like drug laws (or tying alligators to fire hydrant laws) are selectively enforced. Facism happens when the law has enshrined a common victimless crime, so then the police can arrest anyone they want.
Since so many people smoke weed, everyone can be a criminal, even the fucking president. (who never inhaled!) Obamacare is good because it envelops more of the people in the legitimate capitalistic exchange of drugs. We desperately need to do something to make legitimate substances competitive with black market drugs, and Obamacare does that.
Obamacare distributes safer alternatives to the crystal meth and PCP moonshine already exploding everywhere-- the pressure of science has busted the dam on hundreds of new medicinal and recreational mood-altering drugs being invented with which the law cannot possibly coherently keep up with. Grey and black market drugs are not taxed. Right now too many Americans are addicted to bootlegged drugs that avoid generating any legitimate revenue for anybody and instead generate revenue for terrorists and bankers who retire offshore.
Building a real drug market can single-highhandedly reverse our deficit. We the country of big tobacco. And more drugs for everyone does not have to be horrifying. Even nicotine is becoming safer to use and the new ones can be used safely too, IF we sell and regulate them wisely. And only if. I think Obamacare is a small step for a better direction.
Once upon a time, I got a job at McDonalds, who promised me full time hours. Tragically, I suck at flipping burgers. So, they changed their mind about my hours, and I started working part time. They told me this was only temporary, but they lied. Before I worked there for nine months, I planned my life around a verbal agreement, but I didn't get that agreement on contract, so I had to eat shit. both full and part time workers were entitled to $4 of free food every day. The free food was more worthwhile in helping us function than my paycheck. When I was working full time, I earned about $40 a day. But when they cut my hours, they didn't cut the free food I was entitled to as an employee meal. So I never bought groceries for nine months. I shared my employee meals with my husband. That's how I worked at McDonalds part time without charging anything to credit cards or starving to death.
Let me explain capitalism: In economics, capital is already produced durable goods that do stuff, and all money is stupid and meaningless. Credit is corporate welfare. It is totally unfair that we spend so much on corporate welfare and so little on people welfare. Because jobs suck.
In all of my years on OD, I have attempted to bait random people into an argument over politics, and I have never succeeded...until you. The only people who note me on politics do so to agree with me. I can only assume that people who would disagree with me are just too intimidated by how right I am all of the time. So when I got 5 notes from the same guy who doesn't like Obamacare, this is exciting.
After McDonalds I started doing streaming video prostitution. As a "webcam model" I could count on making $60 a day. I could make quite a bit more than that if I was up for it. I can't tell you what kind of hours I was working. Because I didn't get paid to prepare to work, time becomes all jumbled. I worked for myself, I could take tax exemptions for all of the computers I bought to stream my high quality pussy squirt on the tubes, and I paid for my husband's health care in cash. That was much more capitalistic than McDonalds.
Jobs are bad. Fuck jobs. I don't care if the hours for people's jobs are cut. I hate jobs. Maybe that makes me an anarchist, but I don't think so. I don't think jobs are good for us. I think Americans should be entrepreneurs. That's why you and your job creators are stupid. Capitalists create their own jobs. They justify their own existences. I don't support most job creators. The biggest job creator in the United States is Wal-Mart.
I don't understand why people think that the government health care death panels exist but the private corporate health care death panels don't exist. You might be amazed to discover that private health care companies are for profit corporations. Private health insurance companies deny people for health insurance all of the time. Actually, Obamacare forces them to stop turning people away for not being profitable! Why does everyone trust health care insurance companies not to kill grandma to raise money for stupid, frivolous absurdities like the Papa John's guy who says he can't raise the price of individual pizzas by 14c to pay for healthcare while literally living in a castle with a moat?
The private sector is lying to you and making a villain out of the government.
The United States is a young country. Humans have invented more crazy shit in the last 75 years than we have in the last 75,000 years. Our entire situation of humanity is unprecedented, essentially, but the US doubly so. So we have attempted to establish democracy here, after killing all of the natives with our alcohol, smallpox and firearms. I think democracy works, but my standards for democracy are pretty low. I think democracy is better than monarchy and that's all that matters to me. So don't tell me that democracy sucks. You suck.
You need to learn more about the law. I attempted to go to school for political science, but I dropped out. Schools are probably better than jobs, but I don't know how much better. I don't like that Obama supports schools, either, but spending-- tra--la-la-- it happens whether you want it to or not. We have to influence what the government chooses to spend that money on. We desperately need to redirect money being spent on destructive policies, such as the War on Drugs.
I am a one issue voter because I know a lot about drugs and Obamacare makes sense to me. Humans are specialized creatures unfortunately. I am pretty terrified about his international policy, but that shit is so secret there's no making sense of it. My only clues about foreign policy come from wikileaks, and Obama is clearly waaaaay more intelligent than GOP at those evil schemes, so... that's something, I guess. Obama killed Bin Laden and wins at foreign policy automatically.
The law is ridiculous. In Florida, it is illegal to tie an alligator to a fire hydrant. Recently, buttsex was illegal in many states, and I think it still is in a few of them. Facism exists when stupid laws like drug laws (or tying alligators to fire hydrant laws) are selectively enforced. Facism happens when the law has enshrined a common victimless crime, so then the police can arrest anyone they want.
Since so many people smoke weed, everyone can be a criminal, even the fucking president. (who never inhaled!) Obamacare is good because it envelops more of the people in the legitimate capitalistic exchange of drugs. We desperately need to do something to make legitimate substances competitive with black market drugs, and Obamacare does that.
Obamacare distributes safer alternatives to the crystal meth and PCP moonshine already exploding everywhere-- the pressure of science has busted the dam on hundreds of new medicinal and recreational mood-altering drugs being invented with which the law cannot possibly coherently keep up with. Grey and black market drugs are not taxed. Right now too many Americans are addicted to bootlegged drugs that avoid generating any legitimate revenue for anybody and instead generate revenue for terrorists and bankers who retire offshore.
Building a real drug market can single-highhandedly reverse our deficit. We the country of big tobacco. And more drugs for everyone does not have to be horrifying. Even nicotine is becoming safer to use and the new ones can be used safely too, IF we sell and regulate them wisely. And only if. I think Obamacare is a small step for a better direction.
